It takes a village. Moms, this post is especially for you. My friend Lisa contacted me a while back telling me about one of her friends who recently wrote a book and wondered if I would take a look at it. I thought it would be fun to also have her guest post for us here on Mommy Moment. So thanks C. J. Schneider for taking time to be with us here today.
My doorbell rings and I drag my heavy heart all the way to my front entrance. It’s a dear friend of mine who has come to my house to give me a private barre class, I pay her by giving her kids piano lessons—it’s a great swap for us.
She looks me over and doesn’t say anything about the fact that I am wearing khakis and a loose blouse, looking far from ready for a workout.
“Ok, let’s go workout in the basement.” I say.
“Great” she replies. “How are things?” she asks as we head downstairs.
I start talking about some superficial things going on in my life, we face each other to begin the workout and then I blurt out:
“Jen, I just realized some things about myself that are very hard to look at and I have been feeling the weight of that realization all week.”
Jen’s ballet stance relaxes. She looks at me with perfect empathy and says:
“Ugh, I’ve been there. That is not an easy place to be.”
And then she waits. Because she knows that I am not interested in strengthening my core or toning my arms at that moment. She gets that I have something bigger going on and she sits down on the floor with me looking like she’s ready to listen. And then, with her ears, her mind and her heart, she listens.
As she leaves my house that day, I close my front door with my heart feeling significantly less heavy. Because having someone hold our hand during the tough moments in our lives is largely where heaven resides here on earth. And that heaven is the strongest antidote to hell any of us have access to.
Every woman who becomes a mother has signed up for a job that is intensely life changing, joyful, miserable, beautiful, lonely, heartwarming and heartbreaking. It’s all there—the good, the bad and the ugly.
Of course it is, because when you become a mom your heart is cemented to the fate of another. This cementing brings both joy and pain like nothing else can which is why we all need each other to cry with during the bad times and to celebrate with during the good times.
It really does take a village.