Now that my daughter has started kindergarten, my two-year-old son has begun some hard core schooling of his own: potty-training.
If you ask Kellen if he is ready to potty-train, he will tell you, “The potty train goes chugga-chugga-choo-choo!” I am sick of changing nasty diapers, so I have taken that to mean “Yes! I am on board this train! Let’s roll!”
Honestly, I think 28 months old should be an appropriate age for a child to be weaned from diapers. Shouldn’t it? Kellen actually started showing interest in the potty months ago. Right before he turned two, he was telling us when he needed to go to the bathroom all the time. Anytime we listened and put him on the potty, he would go immediately. I almost feel like we missed our “golden moment” at that point. But, I thought he was still too young…and we were getting ready to embark on a three-day drive across the country to move to a new state. I couldn’t imagine trying to sit the kid on rest stop and gas station toilets. I just didn’t think the timing was right.
So, now I am at ground zero with a little boy who really doesn’t mind filling his pants and then continuing to play until I catch a whiff and force him to change. This makes it challenging.
My tactics are pretty simple. I have no idea if they work yet, but I will share them with you anyway. That way, if I am doing it all wrong, someone can tell me, “You are doing it all wrong.”
- Little Streaker. I have heard people say that the “no pants” method worked for their kids, so I am trying to let Kellen go without pants (in the house) as much as possible. I think this is working…kind of. Being “bare” certainly helps Kellen remember that when he feels the urge to go to the bathroom, he can’t just go right where he is. It only took a few accidents (fortunately, all “number one”) to help make that reality clear. However…it seems like he is only recognizing that urge when he is bare bottomed. When I have to put a Pull-Up on him so that we can go somewhere, he immediately starts using it like a diaper again. Not quite sure what to do about that yet. I can’t take the kid out naked. But potty-training will never work if he just saves up all his poops for the Pull-Ups.
- Instant Gratification. One way that I try to entice Kellen to use the potty is bribery. (Hey, if not having to have someone scrape excrement off your backside isn’t incentive enough, then Mommy has bring in the heavy lifters.) In our case, it’s Starburst candies. Kellen LOVES Starbursts. In fact, our conversation about this added incentive went like this: I explained to him that he would get one Starburst if he peed on the potty, and two if he went number two. And what did he say to this? Not “yay” or “hooray,” but “I LOVE that!” Then he repeated, “Two Starbursts?” “Yep,” I confirmed. “As long as you do it IN the potty.” Kellen smiled and nodded his head very seriously as he processed this information. Then he stated, “That is willy (really) awesome.” The next day, he tried to negotiate up to three Starbursts for a poop. Hey…at least he gets the idea.
- Future Incentive. And just in case the promise of an immediate sugar rush isn’t enough to do the trick, I have recently started dangling one additional carrot in front of my young son. I made a potty chart (note the lack of artistic talent). I’m sure there are much bigger and better potty charts out there. All I did was draw some lopsided boxes on a piece of white paper with a Sharpie. But Kellen digs it. Then I told him that if he fills the chart up with stickers (one per box), I will take him to the store to buy a new choo-choo train. Kellen is OBSESSED with toy trains right now, so this information almost made his eyes pop out of his head. He gets the same number of stickers as he does with the Starburst method. Only difference: if he has a pee or poop accident on the floor (or elsewhere), then he LOSES the same number of stickers. I figured that should keep us working on the same chart for a while. Kellen totally seems to understand this whole chart thing. As soon as we started using it, he peed on the potty three times in ten minutes. That’s a smart kid.
So…that’s all I’ve got for right now. It has only been a week, so only time will tell. Hopefully not too much time. And not too many stories to tell. Especially gross ones. Keep me in your prayers.
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Kate is a contributing writer for Mommy Moment. Kate is the proud mom of Anna and Kellen, two preschoolers who are starting to pick up all of her best habits: a passion for reading and exploring new places, an intense interest in organizing, and a total disregard for sleep. See what she has been up to over at www.adventuresinparenting.me
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Kate
Monday 28th of February 2011
Hi Jennifer,
Thanks for the comment...it's never too late to ask for an update! So...Kellen is now 33 months old. Since that initial week of potty training, he has NEVER pooped in his pants again EVER! So I consider that, in itself, to be a success. Kellen still has trouble with the peeing part though. At first, he did great about telling us every time he had to go. We flew home to St. Louis about a week after this, and he went potty multiple times on the plane with no accidents! And he still does pretty well in public too. But lately, he has gotten really lazy at home. He pees in his pants quite frequently...I think just because he's busy and knows that someone will quickly come to whisk away the wet pants and replace them with new ones. It is very frustrating, and we're honestly kind of stumped about how to get him to stop it. He knows how to go on his own...but how to get him to stop what he's doing to DO it has proven to be a challenge.
Perhaps he would have done better if we had waited even longer? Who knows. Personally, I'm glad we did it when we did. I don't miss poopy pants, that's for sure!
I wish you the best of luck with your potty training! Hopefully this info helps a little.
Jennifer
Sunday 27th of February 2011
Ok, so I'm new to your site and landed on this potty training page. I'm curious how this all turned out! Can you email me a link if you wrote a post about how the potty training turned out? I have a 29 month old boy ;)
Kate
Friday 17th of September 2010
Thank you all for your comments and support! Point definitely taken: I will stop taking stickers off the chart when Kellen has an accident. In a misguided way, I think I was thinking it would show him that there are consequences when he goes on the floor...but I totally understand what you're saying, and I agree that it's better to stick with "rewards only."
He is slowly making progress. I have a feeling that this will take a few weeks. He is definitely not one of those kids who is going to train himself! :)
Selmada
Wednesday 15th of September 2010
Watching and learning. 15 month old twin boys. I will be here. I try to let them go nekkid once in a while, just because it cant be fun to be trapped in a diaper all the time. The biggest thing I have to watch out for isnt bathroom accidents right now, its grabbing of the brother's private parts and yanking for all its worth.
theclevafella
Wednesday 15th of September 2010
Hello,I agree with Jody - please don't punish your child by taking away rewards previously won. This can actually turn things completely upside down to a point where a toddler is afraid of the potty, resulting in potty training regression. I have articles about this on my blog, hope you take a look, Cheers.